the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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