I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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