I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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