I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
