I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
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Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
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I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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