so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
