Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize