dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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