just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
