seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
