the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
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The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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