i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
