I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
