He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
is it fun? or sober?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
