if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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