I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Is her dick bigger than yours?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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