I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
We smell like vodka and hangover
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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