Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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