I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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