My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
