i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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