when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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