the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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