it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
where are my eyebrows?
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