They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
