did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
