She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
