FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
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