im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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