The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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