I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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