I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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