i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
