I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
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