Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
