Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
