So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
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