I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
