dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
