Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
