I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
