what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
