never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize