When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
We had sex on a dog bed..
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
