I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
