You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
