Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
