The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
