I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
