Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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